Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
Is it penis luge time yet?
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
