My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize
