jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
it's like heaven, but drunker
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
Randomize
