wrigley field is MILF paradise
I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize