How the fuck did you go into work today? You are a better man than I. I couldn't even show up to being unemployed on time.
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
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