i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
I spent most of the stoned conversation with my dad proving to him that the Newfoundland is an actual dog and NOT a Snuffaluffagus-esque figment of my stoned imagination, while laughing over the fact there is actually a place caller Dildo, Canada. Have YOU taken time to be a good dad today?
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
Randomize