today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
