We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
Randomize
