Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Randomize
