It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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