Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
and you fell through a lawn chair
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Randomize
