Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Randomize
