So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
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