Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
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