So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize