He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
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