so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize
