If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize