Christians are straight up FREAKS
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
