apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
Randomize