You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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