Yo dont text me then not text me
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
Randomize
