do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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