Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
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