we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
Randomize