Come see our sink grown plant.
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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