Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
