Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Randomize
