yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
Randomize
