He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
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