Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
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