At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Randomize
