HIV tests are more positive than that guy
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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