I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Randomize
