the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Randomize