i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
Randomize
