I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Randomize
