idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
Randomize