Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize
