i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Randomize
