I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
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