I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
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