I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
Randomize
