You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
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