Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
The adults are the big ones right?
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
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