his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
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