Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
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