I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
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