I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
nutella sex= disaster
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
Randomize
