Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
God, I missed his penis.
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