I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
