I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
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