I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
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